The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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I just witnessed a guy getting shot with a paintball gun.

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What do you call a small mother?

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My friend asked me if I wanted to hear a really good Batman impression, so I said go on then. He shouted, “NOT THE KRYPTONITE!” and I said, “That’s Superman…”

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Man: My wife wants another baby, but do you think we should have kids after 40?