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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
2
I have a friend with no social skills and a Ph.D in the history of palindromes.
I call him Dr. Awkward.
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You know what really makes my day?
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Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a deck of cards!
Psychiatrist: Sit over there. I'll deal with you later!
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I gave my daughter a watch for her birthday. She thought it was so cool and when she showed it to the next door neighbor, he asked, "That's a pretty watch you've got there! Does it tell you the time?"
She laughed and said, "No, this is an old-fashioned watch! You have to look at it!"
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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