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I got hit in the head with a can of Diet Coke today
Don't worry, I'm not hurt. It was a soft drink.
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What did the big bucket say to the small bucket?
"You're looking a little pail!"
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Mahatma Ghandi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an incredible set of callouses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail. Plus, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
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What do you call a teacher with no arms, no legs and no body?
The Head
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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