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I couldn't decide whether my girlfriend was pretty, or ugly.
So I told her that she was pretty ugly.
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I always knock when I open the fridge
Just in case there's a salad dressing.
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If you had a bisexual son, wouldn't he just be called a...
... bison
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Remember, as a child, when air for your bike was free? Now it's $1.50! I asked the gas station attendant why.
He said "inflation".
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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