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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose
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Why was the girl staring at the juice box?
Because it said: "Concentrate."
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Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
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I've been asked out by 20 women today...
I was in the ladies bathroom.
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Whenever I see a school bus, I think about my uncles last words...
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