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I can't take my dog to the park anymore. The ducks keep attacking him.
I guess that's what I get for buying a pure-bread.
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Why couldn’t the duck cross the road?
Because he got his foot stuck in a quack.
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Did you hear about the guy who had the whole left side of his body amputated?
He's alright now.
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England doesn't have a kidney bank.
But it does have a Liverpool.
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I gave all my dead batteries away today…
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