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How many beans do you need to make the perfect bean soup?
239. Because one more would be too farty.
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My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
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How many ADHD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
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My therapist says that I second guess every decision that I ever make.
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What’s it called when you kill chickpeas?
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