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Did you know that...
married couples have a higher chance of divorcing than single people?
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Did you hear about the ATM that got addicted to money?
It suffered from withdrawals.
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Dad: Why is your January report card so bad?
Kid: Things are always marked down after Christmas.
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Want to wake up with a smile on your face?
Go to sleep with a clothes hanger in your mouth.
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I got hit in the head with a can of Diet Coke today
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