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Before my surgery, the anesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation
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Dad, can you put my shoes on?
No, I don't think they'll fit me.
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What do you call an average potato who tells you the play-by-play action in sports?
Commentator.
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Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking that I'm a deck of cards!
Psychiatrist: Sit over there. I'll deal with you later!
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I think my favorite part of going to the gym
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