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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender says:
"Why the long face?"
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Man: My wife wants another baby, but do you think we should have kids after 40?
Doctor: No, 40 children is enough!
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Every morning after I get up, the first thing I do is make my bed.
Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of shit to IKEA.
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Did you hear about the guy who ate bananas whole?
He didn’t peel too well
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What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
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