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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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You know what has 8 legs, 8 hands and 8 eyes?
8 pirates
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My can opener broke ...
Now it’s a can’t opener.
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Dad: Sorry, but I only know how to make two dishes: meat loaf and apple pie.
Kid: Which one is this?
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Do you know why you can't hear pterodactyls urinate?
Because they are extinct.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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