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You know what has 8 legs, 8 hands and 8 eyes?
8 pirates
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I buy my guns from a guy who calls himself "T-Rex."
He's a small arms dealer.
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What do you say to someone you tried to drown but didn't succeed?
Sea ya later.
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Me: this is my house
Friend: what's upstairs Me: stairs don't talk
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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