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Why do most married men die before their wives?
Because they want to.
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Knock-knock! Who's there? Highway cop. Highway cop who?
Highway cop in the morning and have a cup of coffee.
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I couldn't decide what Asian food I wanted more Japanese or Chinese so
I just called it a Thai
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Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Of course! The Empire State Building can’t jump.
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How did the T-rex feel after his workout?
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