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Why did the blind lady fall into the well?
Because she couldn't see that well.
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I call my toilet "the jim" instead of "the john."
That way I can tell people that I go to the jim first thing every morning.
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Told my daughter to wear glasses during math.
It improves division.
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My wife said I was immature.
So I told her to get out of my fort.
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A captain harpooned a whale's tail on his first throw.
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