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When my wife was still pregnant I used to say
that our baby was in his one womb apartment.
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Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can't come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.
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Which state is a pain in the butt to go to?
Prostate
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Converting the number 51, 6 and 500 to Roman numerals doesn’t just make me mad....
It makes me LIVID.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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