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When my grandfather was ill, we rubbed lard on his back.
He went downhill quite quickly after that.
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If you become seriously depressed, try drinking a gallon of water just before you go to bed.
That will give you a reason to get out of bed in the morning.
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What do you call a guy who brings your daughter home late?
An ambulance
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When I was born I was so surprised,
I didn't talk for a year and a half.
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I think my favorite part of going to the gym
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