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What's red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint
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What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket?
“Some asshole has my pen.”
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Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
..an ether/oar situation...
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Why do giraffes have long necks?
Because their head is really far away.
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Joke of the Day
I went to the beekeeper to get 12 bees. He counted and gave me 13. "Sir, you gave me an extra."
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