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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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What’s a thief’s way of saying hello?
Knife to meetcha!
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Why did the Muffin go to the doctor?
He was feeling crummy.
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My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
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What begins with “f” and ends in “uck”
Wrong, what begins with “w” and ends in “hat”
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What bug did dinosaurs hate the most?
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