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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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What did the nuclear physicist have for lunch?
Fission chips.
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What does a dyslexic agnostic insomniac do on his free time?
He stays up at night wondering if there really is a dog.
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My wife kicked me out because of my terrible Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions. But don't worry,
I'll return.
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You know who's breathtaking?
Death.
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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