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What days are the strongest?
Saturday and Sunday. The other ones are weak days.
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My son said "Look! I'm a 3D printer!"
I told him to shut the toilet door when he poops.
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What do you call a woman who always knows where her husband is?
A widow.
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My doctor friend is addicted to hitting his patients on their knees to check their reflexes.
He really gets a kick out of it.
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Husband: Whisper dirty things to me.
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