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Two jumper cables walk into a bar
The bartender goes, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
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I was really angry at my friend Mark for stealing my dictionary
I said, “Mark, my words!”
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My dumbass son thinks there’s the letter F is in the word ‘way’
There’s no F in way.
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I've been asked out by 20 women today...
I was in the ladies bathroom.
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Whenever I see a school bus, I think about my uncles last words...
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