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Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears.
11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.
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A friend of mine tries to impress girls by drawing realistic paintings of the Ford F-150.
He’s a pickup artist.
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Why are cats bad storytellers?
Because they only have one tale.
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My son kept chewing on live electrical wires
So I had to ground him.
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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