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To the person who stole my glasses
I will find you, I have contacts
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When I got to work this morning, my boss stormed up to me and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"
I said, "No, not particularly."
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Where do you find a dog with no legs?
The same place they left him.
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I shot my enemy with a paintball gun
I wanted to see them dye
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Why don’t blind people skydive?
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