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Someone asked Donald J Trump what the "J" stands for
He said, "it stands for 'Genius'."
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Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack.
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What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket?
“Some asshole has my pen.”
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I changed my iPhone name to Titanic.
It’s syncing now.
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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