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My wife says I’m addicted to auctions but she’s wrong. I actually stopped after going once…
...going twice...
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My dad said he couldn’t find his contacts
It was in the top left corner of his phone.
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I took my wife to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you, but she wasn't very happy.
I told her next time she can pick the restaurant, if she really hated Subway that much.
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What fish is the best fighter?
The swordfish.
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What do you call a piece of wood with nothing to do?
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