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My wife just said that in order for our marriage to work, we both need to make sacrifices.
I’m thinking of choosing a goat.
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How does the man in the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
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I told my son I was named after Thomas Jefferson…
He said, “But dad, your name is Brian.” I said, “I know, but I was named AFTER Thomas Jefferson.”
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As my dad was walking me down the aisle of my third wedding he goes...
You know Erin, I keep giving you away but they keep giving you back
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What’s it called when you kill chickpeas?
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