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My neighbor told me he only sleeps standing up.
But everyone knows he lies a lot.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Caller: Operator! Call me an ambulance!
Operator: Okay, you're an ambulance!
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The first photograph of a black hole was released
It sucks
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Golf pro: Now I want you to go through the motions without actually hitting the ball.
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