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My grandma isn’t a fan of her new stairlift.
She says it drives her up the wall.
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Every morning after I get up, the first thing I do is make my bed.
Tomorrow I’m returning this piece of shit to IKEA.
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I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia
She whispered, "They're right behind you"
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What happened to the pirate who couldn't pee?
He became irate.
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What color do cats like best?
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