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My dad’s answer to everything is alcohol
He doesn’t drink, it's just that he's really bad at crossword puzzles
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Doing a good job at work is like wetting your pants in a dark suit.
You get a warm feeling, but no one else notices.
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Albert Einstein was a genius but
his brother Frank was a true monster
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My wife said she prefers brown rice
That’s just riceist
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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