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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Why was the calendar depressed?
Because it’s days were numbered!
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I was born in the morning at 7:11
My parents thought it was pretty cool, but the store clerk wasn't happy about the mess.
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Mom bought me some camouflage cargo pants.
She will never see me in them.
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My girlfriend likes to take the stairs but I prefer taking the elevator
I guess we were raised defferently.
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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