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Why don't vegans have sex?
Because beating meat is animal cruelty.
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How can you identify a proctologist?
He's the doctor wearing a watch above his elbow.
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Why did Cinderella get kicked off the football team?
Because she kept running from the ball!
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Two goldfish are in a tank, one turns and says to the other,
“how do you drive this thing?”
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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