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Why didn’t the melons get married?
Because they cantaloupe
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Why does seaguls live by the sea?
Because if they lived by the bay, they would be bagels.
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What is cold and stands under a street lamp?
A frostitute.
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I swallowed my flute, and I can't get it out!
Thank goodness you weren't playing the piano.
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I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.
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