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What's the difference between a cat and a comma?
One has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause
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I gave my daughter a watch for her birthday. She thought it was so cool and when she showed it to the next door neighbor, he asked, "That's a pretty watch you've got there! Does it tell you the time?"
She laughed and said, "No, this is an old-fashioned watch! You have to look at it!"
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Got fired from the sperm bank yesterday
Apparently you’re not allowed to nudge the nearest co-worker and say “get a load of this guy” every time someone walks in.
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While I was at the gym, I decided to hop on a treadmill.
People started giving me weird looks, so I started jogging instead.
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Don't spell part backwards
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