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What happens to an egg every time you look at it?
It becomes egg sighted
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Did you hear about the guy who invented Altoids?
He made a mint.
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My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink…
No one listened, but he kept warning them until they got sick of him and kicked him out of the cinema.
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What does a panda use to make pancakes?
A pan...duh
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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