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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
5
What does a zombie vegetarian eat?
“GRRRAAAIINS!”
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Don't trust atoms.
They make up everything!
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My deaf girlfriend was talking in her sleep last night.
Damn near poked my eye out.
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“Dad, can you call mom’s phone? She can’t find it.”
“Absolutely! ‘Mom’s phone! Mom’s phone!’”
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I finally realized why trees don’t have teeth.
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