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What did the doctor say to his patient that wanted to do his own stitches?
Suture self.
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A girl named Ruth quit working at our office.
I've been referring to the office as 'ruthless" since then.
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Why was the toilet paper rolling down the hill?
It was in a rush to get to the bottom.
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When I realized how terrible the play was, I quietly resigned from my job as a stage designer.
I left without making a scene.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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