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Unfortunately, my obese parrot just died.
It is, however, a huge weight off my shoulders
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What do Mexicans eat when it's cold out?
Brrrritos
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A dog slowly rolls past you in a red plastic baby car.
This is a bad neighborhood.
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I left $100 in my suit jacket at the dry cleaners.
Unfortunately when I went to get it back, they were shut down for money laundering.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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