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My wife yelled at me, telling me to put the toilet seat down..
Don't know why I was carrying it around in the first place.
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What does a white hat dropped into the Red Sea become?
Wet
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A receptionist said to the psychiatrist, "A man is out here who says he is invisible."
The doctor replied, "Tell him I can't see him right now."
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What did the undertaker say when he realized he'd buried the wrong coffin?
I've made a grave mistake
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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