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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
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What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?
"It's pasture bedtime."
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Shout out to whoever first came up with the idea to shred cheese.
It was a grate idea.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7 because 7,8,9 but why did 7 eat 9?
Because you are supposed to eat 3 square meals a day
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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