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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My son kept chewing on electrical cords so I had to ground him.
He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly.
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I've done some terrible things for money..
Like getting up early for work.
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What's green, has four legs, and if it fell out of a tree, could kill you?
A pool table!
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An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have:
the older she gets, the more interested he is in her.
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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