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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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If a child refuses to go to sleep, is he resisting arrest?
No, he's avoiding a kidnapping.
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I just flew in from a Transformers convention
And boy are my arms tires
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My wife said, “You really have no sense of direction, do you?”
I said, “Where did that come from?”
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My jackass husband just hit me with this one. Pretend you are on a boat surrounded by sharks. How do you survive?
You stop pretending.
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Would anyone be interested in being my companion?
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