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I burned 2,000 calories yesterday.
Left the brownies in the oven too long.
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Spring is here!
I got so excited I wet my plants!
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Patient: Doctor,, my hair keeps falling out. What can you give me to keep it in?
Doctor: What about a shoebox?
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Why do boxers have TGIF written on the inside of their shoes?
"Toes go in first."
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When I was young, my dad used to tear up the last page of all my comic books and never told me why.
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