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I am suspicious that my wife is secretly adding glue to my weapons collection.
She denies it, but I’m sticking to my guns.
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As my Dad used to say, “when one door closes, another one opens.”
Lovely man, lousy cabinet maker though.
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Some guy came up to me and said, "I haven't gone to the bathroom in two weeks."
I said, "you're full of crap"
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What cats make good bowlers?
Alley cats.
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What do you say to comfort an English teacher?
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