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Golfer: Caddiemaster, this boy you assigned me isn't even five years old!
Caddiemaster: Better for you, sir. He probably can't count past ten.
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Why should you be worried if you see cows smoking marijuana?
Cause that's when the steaks are highest.
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Last night I dreamed I wrote Lord of the Rings.
Guess I was Tolkien in my sleep.
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Who is the patron saint of e-mail?
St. Francis of a CC.
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
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