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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Do you know why I can’t be buried in a cemetery?
Because I’m still alive.
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I’m trying to convince my wife that I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.
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Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
Because every play has a cast.
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What's the best kind of booze if you want to dance all night long?
Wild Twerky
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My first day working as a pilot: *looking down nervously* what are all these buttons for?
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