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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Do you know why I can’t be buried in a cemetery?
Because I’m still alive.
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What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Breathe, damn it! Breathe!
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A store clerk fought off an armed robber with a labeling gun
Now police are looking for a man with a price on his head.
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At the end of the physics lecture, I asked my professor, “What exactly happened before The Big Bang?”
He said, “Sorry. No time.”
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I was kidnapped by mimes once
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