The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

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I bought some noise cancelling headphones.

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I was at a restaurant with my wife when a waitress suddenly screamed, "Does anyone know CPR??"