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I was feeling depressed. So my wife put her hand on my shoulder and said "Earth."
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At first I thought it was great marrying an archeologist...
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What do you call a teacher with no arms, no legs and no body?
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Why did the tomato blush?
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I went to the beekeeper to get 12 bees. He counted and gave me 13. "Sir, you gave me an extra."

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