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I was caught by a gang of mimes.
They performed unspeakable acts on me...
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What do thieves make their weapons from?
Steal.
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People always say that hard work never killed anybody. Oh yeah?
When's the last time you've ever heard of anyone who rested to death?
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Chris: Hey can I borrow a ten? Kristen: Sure!
Christen: thank you Kris: Anytime
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My wife asked me if I'm ever gonna stop singing "Wonderwall"
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