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I was caught by a gang of mimes.
They performed unspeakable acts on me...
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What does a turtle do on their birthday?
They shellabrate
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What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he lost his job?
"Oh snap!"
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Child: Dad, why do you write so slow?
Dad: I'm a slow reader.
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One impeachment is bad, but two impeachments.
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