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I just realized Vampires don't exist in Africa.
Vampires can be killed by Holy Water, and they bless the rains down in Africa.
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A person asked me, "Aren't you the guy who brags about weird stuff?"
I replied, "No, Im the guy who takes the longest baths in the city".
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What's the difference between a guitar, a fish, and glue?
You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish!
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Wife: I thought we agreed on three beers and be home by ten.
Husband: I'm sorry, honey, I always get those two mixed up.
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Why did the orange juice factory worker lose his job?
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