The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

2

I finally bought the limited edition Thesaurus that I've always wanted. When I opened it, all the pages were blank

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0

In my twenties, I used to live on a houseboat, and started seeing the girl next door.

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I finally got my dream job at the guillotine factory

4

Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...