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Did you hear about the new dating site for retired chemists?
It's called "Carbon Dating."
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What do you say to someone you tried to drown but didn't succeed?
Sea ya later.
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How do depressed frogs die?
They Kermit suicide.
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My mum didn't like my report card. She said "I want more A's".
I said okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
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Cosmetic surgery used to be something that people would be embarrassed to speak about
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